Actress Chike Ike pens an open letter to her fans, opening up about the
physical abuse she suffered in the hands of the man she called her
husband for five years. Find her story below...
The past
three years has been a very emotional period for me. I focused my energy
on work and to build back my self esteem. its been really hard for me
to come out straight and talk about this because sometimes I pinch
myself to wake up and not believe that I was a victim of domestic
violence. I've been through a lot in my life, faced a lot of challenges
but this is one topic I've tried so hard to avoid and have been waiting
for the right time but I have come to a resolve that there's really no
right time because every second of the day,lives are being lost due to
domestic violence. I was a victiim of domestic violence in my marriage
and that was the singular reason I left my marriage, aside other
reasons.
Growing
up as a girl. I was always known as the sweetest kid on the block,
before I got married, I have been through some relationships and for
once no man had ever laid a finger on me. The first time it happened in
my marriage I didn't understand it because I am not the type of woman a
man beats but I guess there are no types. It just happens and no woman
deserves it. As a young girl I thought it was love or his way of
expressing his emotions,after every beating he pleads , cries and says
it won't happen again, once again I thought it was love and made excuses
for him. Over the years when it kept happening consistently I started
looking for other definitions for it. I started loosing my self
pride,self esteem , self worth, and most painfully i lost a pregnancy
(Miscarriage) I almost lost my life in the process then I realised how
serious and abnormal it really was.
I have heard and read a lot
of accusations from ignorant people who don't know my story,I guess
that's why they are ignorant. I was 20yrs old and very naïve to the
world when I got married .“ They said I married for money“ LOL. I was
married to a corporate guy,who had a 9_5 job in a bank, Lives in a
rented 2 bedroom apartment at Egbe.. So do the maths! . I married for
love. I did a traditional wedding. A white wedding and a court wedding.
So that's how much I wanted to be married forever. For five years I
hoped, prayed & wished that one day it will all change. But the last
straw that broke the carmels back was during a heated argument he threw
a glass jug to my face and I dogged it and it shattered on d wall. I
saw death flash before me and I made a decision to save my life. I left
my marriage.
Am not saying this to draw pity from anyone because
we are entitled to our opinions and believes. I am not also saying this
to discourage people from falling in love because its a beautiful
feeling and I still believe in it. I am saying this to educate, share
and talk about my experience as a victim of domestic violence because it
is real.
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